Wednesday, May 6, 2009

Loved Ones,

In rereading my last posting, I found it so ironic that the title was "fear" and it was signed, "not alone and not afraid!" I did not even catch that as I wrote, just reaching out for help in trying to stand strong. I hope it is not disappointing to all of you, the fears; we have felt them all along. "Not afraid" is truly my highest hope and goal. For me, however, it takes prayer and determination to be in that spot.

The girls and I are getting along. We are doing our best to learn how to keep going, knowing that God's care for us can and has meant that we may experience things we are afraid of. How I wish this wasn't true!

However, I am trying to be thankful for my fears, knowing that it truly gives me a window to understand how my girls may feel, and help all of us to find a way through for our life.

I am so thankful for the girls! They are looking forward to making me breakfast in bed for Mother's Day. Ray did this with them last year and they are excited to continue the tradition.

I know it will be a bittersweet day for all of us. We are looking forward to visiting Ray's grave as the gravestone has finally arrived, exciting news since our visit there last week. I am so thankful it will be there for Mother's Day.

We all continue to be so thankful for your prayers, your company, and your encouragement.

"We wait in hope for the LORD; he is our help and our shield. In him our hearts rejoice, for we trust in his holy name. May your unfailing love rest upon us, O LORD, even as we put our hope in you." Psalm 33:20-22

not alone and not afraid --



Melissa Anderson said...

I think you have done an extraordinary job of facing fear head on in a very brave and spiritual way. I admire your convictions and will be thinking of you on Mothers Day especially.

Melissa said...

I too think you are facing your fears amazingly. Today I thought of you and prayed for you as a Mother, which you also do amazingly. I hope that in those times when you don't feel adequate that you know the girls will be mothered by God, who also can fill the gap left by Ray's death.