Today marked 10 years with Ray in Heaven.
We celebrated Ray all weekend, with a mass by Father Brankin, at an Irish bar, at the grave and with family meals.
It was so good to see our friends and family and celebrate Ray with them.
I've been writing Ray's story the last six month. It has connected us so deeply with Ray's struggle with cancer.
Though we always remember Ray, the stories we tell are usually about his humor and who he was before cancer. Going through all the memories has brought back how it felt to endure this very difficult journey.
Remembering this has brought new insights and renewed mission. Over Christmas we spent time at the same cancer ward that we spent that last Christmas with Ray. We made cards and delivered them to patients. I thought it would be terrible to connect to the struggle others are now facing. I felt glad. I felt glad to use those very hard memories to help others.
Being with those who face the threat of their very life, brings back just how inspirational Ray was as he coped with this same threat. Over time the things I say about him lose the freshness of that feeling. Writing the story and connecting with others in the same spot, brings it all back.
Ray really was this amazing. He really did deal with this incredibly sad loss with such grace, sacrifice, and acceptance. Without complaint. With God at his side.
I know this. I've known this. It has influenced so greatly my own path in going forward after losing him. But, it's good to have a fresh reminder, even for me. To remember this perspective. To remember how much we have with each day. To remember that he was blessed. And that we are. And to feel that, not with strife, but with love. In truth. To then use these gifts in love.
It's the task of life.
We remember all of you Ray. We remember your humor, your partnership, your kindness to others. But we especially your example. You set the bar really high. Right up to heaven.
You are in our hearts always.
not alone and not afraid -
kristin
"Blessed are the poor in spirit, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven. Blessed are those who mourn, for they will be comforted. Blessed are the meek, for they will inherit the earth. Blessed are those who hunger and thirst after righteousness, for they will be filled. Blessed are the merciful, for they shall be shown mercy. Blessed are the pure in heart, for they will see God. Blessed are the peacemakers, for they will be called the sons of God. Blessed are those who are persecuted because of righteousness, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven." Mathew 5:2-10
"Dear children, let us not love with words or speech but with actions and in truth." I John 3:18
