Sunday, October 25, 2009

Last Soccer Game

Loved Ones,

Sometimes it is not the days that I expect to miss Ray that I really miss him, it is other days, days that don't seem on their face as monumental, but are.

I am prepared that Ray will not be there for his birthday, for example, but I forget to be prepared for other smaller events.

Today was our neighborhood Halloween party, and as I got the girls ready, I thought, wait, who do I show them to? And then Ray's absence seemed so large. And I missed him as I walked through the doors, and as I sat with the other moms and dads and watched the girls.

Later in the afternoon, it was Nora's last soccer game for the outdoor season. Lucy is fighting a cold so I waited until the last second to get her up from her nap and out the door. And all the way to the game she coughed and coughed. When we arrived, I told Nora I'd have to miss the game because I couldn't have Lucy outside in the cold, thinking I should probably take her to the doctor instead.

But then the sun came out and Barbie Nutcracker went on in the car and I got to coach Nora's last game.

If only I could summon Ray's help whenever I need it. But today, he was there.

"If I go up to the heavens, you are there; if I make my bed in the depths, you are there. If I rise on the wings of the dawn, if I settle on the far side of the sea, even there your hand will guide me, your right hand will hold me fast." Psalm 139:8-10

not alone and not afraid --



Cheryl said...

These are the times you need to call me. I would love to watch Lucy for you while you are needing to be with one of the other girls.

Melissa Anderson said...


Just checked in with your blog and wanted to let you know that you are prayed for everyday. We have your family Christmas pic. from last year hanging by my desk, I was cleaning in there today and was thinking of you and the girls. Hang in there.

choose said...

Dear Kristin,
I recently came across your blog but I followed your and Ray's journey through my Mom (Lois) as much as I could. I have thought of you so often and prayed for you and your girls. I apologize for not telling you sooner - too consumed in my own busyness and struggle with my children's multiple health issues. But better late than never, I guess. So, my dear cousin, I'm letting you know that I do pray for you so often - that He will be your strength when you have none left; that He will be your joy when your heart is full of pain; that He will be your Hope for a brighter tomorrow. Blessings on you and your darling girls, Jennifer (Badgero) Dudenhofer

Anonymous said...

Kristin, I am remembering this very difficult day a year ago. I am thinking of you and asking God to cover you with his comfort and strength and encouragement. You have been so honoring to Ray, and a blessing to your families and friends, in the ways that you have walked through this year. I love you! Molly Guillaume