The girls and I went to church yesterday for the first time since Ray died. None of the girls wanted to stay in childcare so all four of us sat in the row. Our pastor spoke eloquently of Christ's healing that he gave freely to so many. He said that sometimes this healing was physical, and other times it was emotional and spiritual, allowing us to journey the roads we must travel.
This spoke to me. It is always a wonder when so many pray for healing, how God answers those prayers. We hoped so much that Ray's healing would be on earth. While I am so grateful for Ray's healing in heaven, I do believe that part of his and our healing was here, giving us the very strength to travel the road we walked.
And, though the road we walk now is long, I do feel God's hand upon us as we walk. And Ray's. The girls and I laughed so hard as we thought of how happy Ray would have been with our car that we finally cleaned out yesterday.
I also want you to know that we do feel God's hand from yours. So many many things brighten our days, the gym and pool membership from our neighbors, the heart shaped cookies from friends, coordination of our sump pump (!), so many cards with loving and kind words about Ray, masses in his honor... The list is long and all of it together makes it a little easier to have joy in our days.
Our prayer requests are these: for those times when we feel Ray's loss so dearly -- family dinner time, weekends, the old and familiar routines that we must resume in his absence. And for the girls, for those times when they achieve something they so dearly would loved to have shared with their dad and when they think of their dad -- that they always know his continued love from heaven.
"Blessed are those who mourn, for they will be comforted." Matthew 5:4
not alone and not afraid --