Loved ones,
It's been a long summer! The girls and I had a great trip to DC to attend the 2nd Annual Ray Fitzgerald Charity Classic Softball Tournament. It was a great great day with old and new friends, playing softball and raising money to fight cancer! We were so thrilled to attend and so glad for the support of so many for such a tremendous cause.
This past few weeks since we came home, I've continued my work with the National Cancer Institute to study gastric cancer through the Cancer Genome Atlas. This is hard work! I am so grateful for the Congressional support for this effort as it takes dedication and vigilence to overcome the many challenges to this research! The problems are many! And I am so grateful for the bright minds and strong hearts we have to get it done!
This is a multifront battle. Last weekend I attended Ray's 25th grade school reunion. There Ray's classmates also raised money to fight cancer on Ray's behalf.
I have been struck this week by the difficult nature of cancer research, the many many obstacles. The fight takes such perseverance. It is a difficult fight for me to fight, an anxious fight, but one I know I must undertake for the many people who will face this deadly and destructive disease.
Therefore, I am all the more glad for all of you, my allies in this work. You mean so much to me. You mean so much to my girls who pray every night that scientists will study their dad's cancer and find a cure.
not alone and not afraid --
kristin
"For though we live in the world, we do not wage war as the world does. The weapons we fight with are not the weapons of the world. On the contrary, they have divine power to demolish strongholds." 2 Corinthians 10:3-4
Thursday, August 19, 2010
Wednesday, June 16, 2010
Father's Day
Loved Ones,There are so many times that we have missed Ray's presence this last week. The girls' first swim meet, Nora's dance recital, Ray's godson's graduation, getting good news about our cancer research, the Blackhawks victory. We know he is celebrating with us in heaven but we sure would love to hear his voice cheering.
A friend said to me that time heals but it does not replace. And that's right. We are healing, but the loss of our Ray leaves a hole in our hearts.
We will be thinking of Ray especially this weekend on Father's Day. We are grateful to the many fathers around us who take the time to cheer on our girls.
"He has sent me to bind up the brokenhearted, to proclaim freedom for the captives and release from darkness for the prisoners, to proclaim the year of the LORD's favor and the day of vengeance of our God, to comfort all who mourn, and provide for those who grieve in Zion— to bestow on them a crown of beauty instead of ashes, the oil of gladness instead of mourning, and a garment of praise instead of a spirit of despair." Isaiah 61:2
not alone and not afraid --
kristin
Monday, March 29, 2010
Testifying Before Congress
Loved Ones,
The girls and I traveled to D.C. last week for a Congressional Hearing on cancer research. I was able to take part in the hearing, giving testimony about the sore lack of funding for gastrointestinal cancers like Ray's. It was thrilling to be able to speak to people who can truly make a difference; a big step in our campaign to alert the National Cancer Institute to the problem, and motivate action. Many many people helped to make this happen and happen well and we were so glad to be able to devote our efforts toward preventing additional death and loss from these cancers.
Nora and Maggie were able to attend the hearing, to hear the words said about their dad, and witness the actions taken in response. And this, a big step in our campaign to restore our own security.
I have been listening to a copy of Il Divo's Christmas album. Someone, during that Christmas when Ray was sick, sent this CD. I've been so glad of it. There is a song, that speaks of a person who almost loses his faith, but then finds it again. "Come and rejoice, what is lost is found."
When I hear this song I always feel a wellspring of emotion. Though I've felt no danger of losing my faith in any of this, my own security, and that of my girls, was rocked by all that we endured, and it's taking awhile to regain our footing. Because, one cannot be reassured in the same ways.
Before Ray was sick I knew intrinsically that the answer to fears could not be that they would not occur. But I hoped it was the case. Of course I know now, in a very real way, that fears can and do occur. And my girls know it too. And so to quiet those fears, one cannot respond that things just won't happen again, that somehow, we've fulfilled our duty. There has to be safety, even knowing all that can occur.
Of course, looking back, we know that we were held and sustained by our God. And there is hope in that.
It is the paradox of knowing that we can survive, and not wanting to lose again. The task of wholly and truly submitting to God's will, even and especially knowing what it can entail.
There are days, many days, where I simply want to beg God whatever his will, not to let it occur. But I strive to, as my dear and recently departed Grandma Gaye says, say: "Yes Lord, yes, yes, YES."
And so this is my task. To find this way of existing, not in fear, but in confidence, whatever may be to come. To live this for myself, and teach it to the girls. To be able to say, someday, and hopefully someday soon, that what was lost, is found.
not alone and not afraid,
kristin
"So he got up and came to his father. But while he was still a long way off, his father saw him and felt compassion for him, and ran and embraced him and kissed him. "And the son said to him, 'Father, I have sinned against heaven and in your sight; I am no longer worthy to be called your son.' "But the father said to his slaves, 'Quickly bring out the best robe and put it on him, and put a ring on his hand and sandals on his feet; and bring the fattened calf, kill it, and let us eat and celebrate; for this son of mine was dead and has come to life again; he was lost and has been found.' And they began to celebrate." Luke 15:20-24
The girls and I traveled to D.C. last week for a Congressional Hearing on cancer research. I was able to take part in the hearing, giving testimony about the sore lack of funding for gastrointestinal cancers like Ray's. It was thrilling to be able to speak to people who can truly make a difference; a big step in our campaign to alert the National Cancer Institute to the problem, and motivate action. Many many people helped to make this happen and happen well and we were so glad to be able to devote our efforts toward preventing additional death and loss from these cancers.
Nora and Maggie were able to attend the hearing, to hear the words said about their dad, and witness the actions taken in response. And this, a big step in our campaign to restore our own security.
I have been listening to a copy of Il Divo's Christmas album. Someone, during that Christmas when Ray was sick, sent this CD. I've been so glad of it. There is a song, that speaks of a person who almost loses his faith, but then finds it again. "Come and rejoice, what is lost is found."
When I hear this song I always feel a wellspring of emotion. Though I've felt no danger of losing my faith in any of this, my own security, and that of my girls, was rocked by all that we endured, and it's taking awhile to regain our footing. Because, one cannot be reassured in the same ways.
Before Ray was sick I knew intrinsically that the answer to fears could not be that they would not occur. But I hoped it was the case. Of course I know now, in a very real way, that fears can and do occur. And my girls know it too. And so to quiet those fears, one cannot respond that things just won't happen again, that somehow, we've fulfilled our duty. There has to be safety, even knowing all that can occur.
Of course, looking back, we know that we were held and sustained by our God. And there is hope in that.
It is the paradox of knowing that we can survive, and not wanting to lose again. The task of wholly and truly submitting to God's will, even and especially knowing what it can entail.
There are days, many days, where I simply want to beg God whatever his will, not to let it occur. But I strive to, as my dear and recently departed Grandma Gaye says, say: "Yes Lord, yes, yes, YES."
And so this is my task. To find this way of existing, not in fear, but in confidence, whatever may be to come. To live this for myself, and teach it to the girls. To be able to say, someday, and hopefully someday soon, that what was lost, is found.
not alone and not afraid,
kristin
"So he got up and came to his father. But while he was still a long way off, his father saw him and felt compassion for him, and ran and embraced him and kissed him. "And the son said to him, 'Father, I have sinned against heaven and in your sight; I am no longer worthy to be called your son.' "But the father said to his slaves, 'Quickly bring out the best robe and put it on him, and put a ring on his hand and sandals on his feet; and bring the fattened calf, kill it, and let us eat and celebrate; for this son of mine was dead and has come to life again; he was lost and has been found.' And they began to celebrate." Luke 15:20-24
Thursday, January 21, 2010
One Year Anniversary
Loved Ones,
We had a very special day remembering Ray today. It was filled with a lot of Ray's favorite things, and a lot of our favorite ways to remember and honor him. Friends and family gathered here in Naperville, in Chicago, and in DC for masses in Ray's honor, with times of fellowship, food and fun memories as well.
It means so much to us the many of you that remembered Ray in many ways. The calls, prayers, emails, and your presence with us meant so very much.
We miss Ray so much every day, and we are so glad to have the time with so many of you to honor him.
And, we express our heartfelt thanks for the many ways that you have remembered Ray and supported us throughout this first year.
"The LORD is my shepherd, I shall not be in want. He makes me lie down in green pastures, he leads me beside quiet waters, he restores my soul."
Psalm 23:1-3
not alone and not afraid --
kristin
We had a very special day remembering Ray today. It was filled with a lot of Ray's favorite things, and a lot of our favorite ways to remember and honor him. Friends and family gathered here in Naperville, in Chicago, and in DC for masses in Ray's honor, with times of fellowship, food and fun memories as well.
It means so much to us the many of you that remembered Ray in many ways. The calls, prayers, emails, and your presence with us meant so very much.
We miss Ray so much every day, and we are so glad to have the time with so many of you to honor him.
And, we express our heartfelt thanks for the many ways that you have remembered Ray and supported us throughout this first year.
"The LORD is my shepherd, I shall not be in want. He makes me lie down in green pastures, he leads me beside quiet waters, he restores my soul."
Psalm 23:1-3
not alone and not afraid --
kristin
Sunday, January 10, 2010
A planting of the Lord for the display of His splendor
Loved Ones,
For the past few months I've been encouraging a family with cancer. Their tale is similar to ours and it will have a similar ending soon. As they sit at the side of their loved one, however, there is joy, there is peace and above all, there is faith. Something I also have experienced. As I searched for a verse to send them, I found this:
"The Spirit of the Sovereign LORD is on me, because the LORD has anointed me to preach good news to the poor. He has sent me to bind up the brokenhearted, to proclaim freedom for the captives and release from darkness for the prisoners, to proclaim the year of the LORD's favor and the day of vengeance of our God, to comfort all who mourn, and provide for those who grieve in Zion— to bestow on them a crown of beauty instead of ashes, the oil of gladness instead of mourning, and a garment of praise instead of a spirit of despair. They will be called oaks of righteousness, a planting of the LORD for the display of his splendor."
Isaiah 61:1-3
Nowhere is this more apparent, than at the bedside of a loved one who is going too soon.
That crown of beauty, that oil of gladness, that garment of praise, that can only come from strength far beyond ourselves.
And it struck me that this is true of us too. That our life this year -- this crown of beauty reclaimed from ashes -- yes, many times in sadness, but always in faith and often with joy -- that this too is a testimony of the strength of our Lord. A planting of the Lord for the display of his splendor.
Though it is not understandable, it can only be true.
These verses and these thoughts, give me comfort. Especially as we near the one year anniversary of Ray's death on January 21.
not alone and not afraid --
kristin
For the past few months I've been encouraging a family with cancer. Their tale is similar to ours and it will have a similar ending soon. As they sit at the side of their loved one, however, there is joy, there is peace and above all, there is faith. Something I also have experienced. As I searched for a verse to send them, I found this:
"The Spirit of the Sovereign LORD is on me, because the LORD has anointed me to preach good news to the poor. He has sent me to bind up the brokenhearted, to proclaim freedom for the captives and release from darkness for the prisoners, to proclaim the year of the LORD's favor and the day of vengeance of our God, to comfort all who mourn, and provide for those who grieve in Zion— to bestow on them a crown of beauty instead of ashes, the oil of gladness instead of mourning, and a garment of praise instead of a spirit of despair. They will be called oaks of righteousness, a planting of the LORD for the display of his splendor."
Isaiah 61:1-3
Nowhere is this more apparent, than at the bedside of a loved one who is going too soon.
That crown of beauty, that oil of gladness, that garment of praise, that can only come from strength far beyond ourselves.
And it struck me that this is true of us too. That our life this year -- this crown of beauty reclaimed from ashes -- yes, many times in sadness, but always in faith and often with joy -- that this too is a testimony of the strength of our Lord. A planting of the Lord for the display of his splendor.
Though it is not understandable, it can only be true.
These verses and these thoughts, give me comfort. Especially as we near the one year anniversary of Ray's death on January 21.
not alone and not afraid --
kristin
Saturday, December 26, 2009
Ray's First Christmas in Heaven
Loved Ones,
Well, Ray had his first Christmas in heaven and we had ours without him here. It is good to think of the celebration they must have up there.
But, we sure miss Ray. There were so many times during the season that we missed him dearly. I tried to keep focused on anticipating Christ's coming and patiently waiting for his plan. So many things about advent really spoke to me this year.
We thank you for the many ways that you reached out to us this season -- even a sentence or two in a Christmas card meant a lot. Things still aren't the same and the many gestures of care helped us when we felt Ray's absence so strongly.
We pray that you had a joyful Christmas.
"For a child has been born for us, a son given to us;authority rests upon his shoulders;and he is named Wonderful Counselor, Mighty God,Everlasting Father, Prince of Peace." Is. 9
not alone and not afraid --
kristin
Well, Ray had his first Christmas in heaven and we had ours without him here. It is good to think of the celebration they must have up there.
But, we sure miss Ray. There were so many times during the season that we missed him dearly. I tried to keep focused on anticipating Christ's coming and patiently waiting for his plan. So many things about advent really spoke to me this year.
We thank you for the many ways that you reached out to us this season -- even a sentence or two in a Christmas card meant a lot. Things still aren't the same and the many gestures of care helped us when we felt Ray's absence so strongly.
We pray that you had a joyful Christmas.
"For a child has been born for us, a son given to us;authority rests upon his shoulders;and he is named Wonderful Counselor, Mighty God,Everlasting Father, Prince of Peace." Is. 9
not alone and not afraid --
kristin
Monday, November 30, 2009
Thanksgiving
Loved Ones,
I wanted to write a note to tell you how thankful we are for all of you. We know that your love and care have helped us get through these last 10 months without Ray here. I know that it is hard to sometimes know what to say or do, but I wanted to say thank you for figuring it out and helping us. I feel God has blessed us with some special angels, and I am very grateful. And I know the girls are too.
It is very sad to enter this holiday season without Ray at our side. We miss him so every day. Today we had dinner with Ray's family and we were so glad to be with them. We are very thankful for our family and their unending support.
And the girls and I are so thankful for each other! We do not take this gift lightly. Each day is so very precious.
As the days go on, we are simply grateful for every minute we shared with Ray. And for every moment we think of him now. We know he must be very close today.
This was our Thanksgiving prayer from last year. And I thought it fitting today.
"Sing and make music in your heart to the Lord, always giving thanks to God the Father for everything, in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ." Ephesians 5:20
not alone and not afraid --
kristin
I wanted to write a note to tell you how thankful we are for all of you. We know that your love and care have helped us get through these last 10 months without Ray here. I know that it is hard to sometimes know what to say or do, but I wanted to say thank you for figuring it out and helping us. I feel God has blessed us with some special angels, and I am very grateful. And I know the girls are too.
It is very sad to enter this holiday season without Ray at our side. We miss him so every day. Today we had dinner with Ray's family and we were so glad to be with them. We are very thankful for our family and their unending support.
And the girls and I are so thankful for each other! We do not take this gift lightly. Each day is so very precious.
As the days go on, we are simply grateful for every minute we shared with Ray. And for every moment we think of him now. We know he must be very close today.
This was our Thanksgiving prayer from last year. And I thought it fitting today.
"Sing and make music in your heart to the Lord, always giving thanks to God the Father for everything, in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ." Ephesians 5:20
not alone and not afraid --
kristin
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
